October 24, 2011

Amish Vampiress of the Tribulation

"That’s right. It’s an Amish novel; it’s a vampire novel; it’s an end-times novel. It’s the best of all worlds."

I'm ROTALing over here. This is quite possibly among the top three funniest things I've ever read.

"Twenty-three year old Cassidy lives a simple life in the Amish countryside of Lancaster County. Simple, that is, until Slade Byler moves into the old Lapp farm. Cassidy finds herself irresistibly drawn to the handsome Slade; but she fears to share the secret that she alone knows. For Cassidy is an immortal, a princess in the long line of ancient Amish vampires. Will Slade’s love grow cold when he learns this great secret? Can she give to him a heart that does not beat?"

Click below. Read the rest. Laugh. Hard.

Cassidy: Amish Vampiress of the Tribulation

Rolling On Thin Air Laughing,

p.s. of course, no offense and/or insult intended to anyone Amish. ^_^ I (and the article) are poking fun at Christians and their literature in general.


Jake said...



"Oh, Slade, what can your buggy do against the forces of the Antichrist?"



To quote "Ice Age 3":

"What's wrong with laughing?"
*points* "They DIED laughing!"


whisper said...

*chortles* EPIC line.

I never saw Ice Age 3.... but this quote shows an unusual wisdom and a deep understanding of the danger of excessive mirth. ^_^

Ninja Tim said...

Oh Lord preserve us... O_O

My mind is completely torn in two between the hilarity of the situation and bewilderment at trying to imagine a buggy riding out (or a tank driven by an Amish person... even more interesting) to meet the armies of the Anti-Christ... *wait, what?*

How people come up with this kind of stuff I'll never know... *dies from indecision between laughter and complete discombobulation*

Pathfinder said...

That is the funniest thing I've read since-since... *thinks* ... Wait...that is the funniest thing I've ever read.
Thanks for posting it!

whisper said...

*laughs aloud at Ninja's comments* I know. I know. It's.... brilliant. XD And I died too.

Pathfinder - I know. ^_^ It is so. It's astonishing. Thanks for reading it. XD